The Dreyfuss Report

Election Shocker!

posted by Robert Dreyfuss on 08/08/2008 @ 09:01am

Biblical scholars in Colorado Springs have uncovered startling evidence that Senator John McCain may be the Antichrist. Their conclusions, while highly controversial, may have a dramatic impact on the 2008 elections, since many Bible-believing Christians have already expressed doubts about McCain's fealty to Christianity.

The analysis was conducted by the respected True Bible Society, and it will be published next month in the End Times Journal.

The analysis was especially ironic, given that it came out just one day after McCain was accused of subtly hinting that Barack Obama could be the Antichrist. McCain ran a commercial depicting Obama as "The One," giving rise to charges that he was sending a subliminal messages to anti-Obama Christians.

"What started us looking at this issue is the fact that Senator McCain has declared his intention to maintain US forces in Iraq for a hundred years," said David Jenkins, a leading Biblical scholar. "That means that McCain wants to control Babylon for at least a century." According to many scholars of the Book of Revelation, the Antichrist will try to rebuild the ancient city of Babylon in order to use it as a springboard for an international effort at world domination. Ultimately, the Antichrist will marshal forces from Babylon to spark a showdown with Christian and Jewish-led forces in the battle of Armageddon.

"We believe that the End Times is near, based on the pattern of wars, earthquakes. and other strange phenomena we've been witnessing since the start of the New Millennium," said Jenkins. "Given that it may be imminent, the person who controls Babylon must be the Antichrist." Until 2003, many Christians believed that Saddam Hussein might be the Antichrist, since he started excavations to restore Babylon in the mid 1970s. But Hussein's death meant that the Antichrist is someone else. Since Obama wants to get out of Iraq, he can't be the Antichrist either, concluded Jenkins.

Jenkins said his teams suspicions were further heightened when genealogical research showed that McCain's great-grandfather was actually not John McCain, but John Mihai. Mihai is an ancient Romanian name, and according to Bible-believing Christians, the Antichrist is likely to be a Romanian. "What clinched it for us was that the name Mihai means 'who is like the Lord,'" said Jenkins. "As far as we're concerned, that was enough. It means that McCain might easily pretend to be the Redeemer."

McCain's geniality and folksiness are consistent with his being the Antichrist, Jenkins said. "Many people think that the Antichrist will be a evil-seeming leader, but in fact the Bible tells us that he will be charming."

So far the McCain campaign has refused to comment on Jenkins' study.

Comments (80)

  1. Oh, this thread is just BUILT for LVLIBERTY!

    LOL

    (In fairness, I believe he's not a true "End Timer"...more "End Time-Lite"!)

    Posted by Maskdelta at 08/08/2008 @ 09:10am

  2. Why is it that all thest preachers, David Jenkins, Jeremiah Wrigt... all say that America is going to Hell and damnation?

    Posted by Mistral at 08/08/2008 @ 09:20am

  3. Posted by Mistral at 08/08/2008 @ 09:20am

    Not a typical hard-line Christian position that "everything is fine"!

    heheh

    Posted by Maskdelta at 08/08/2008 @ 09:38am

  4. bush was supposed to be evil incarnate but he is too stupid to even do this right....the world will experience a great upheavel in 2012 according to a lot of books, which would coincide with the end of a disastrous mcbush presidency...

    Remember, "change" can go both ways...not just positive....

    Back to present, the media should jump on mcsame's illegal contributions to his campaign he just had to return after waxman was pressing down on him, from foreign contributors whose companies are extorting military contractors and fleecing americans....I thought that was cheney!!! for a few wealthy, even better news, cheney's company now perfected a technique for horizontal drilling to destroy even more private lands without people knowing....it is happening now in central NY....a few rich landowners are getting rich...but everybody else will have future health problems, our wells are all interconnected with shale....EPA/NYS DEC says we are not really important..and bush just pressed EPA to lower the amount each of us are worth by a million....so we are just worth less now......according to bush.....

    mcbush was all about campaign finance reform....until it bit him in his wrinkled old arse

    I am sick of mcbushies who don't do anything until they get caught...they are all scum....whoever votes for this scumbag after all the news, flip-flops, etc...is off their rocker....vote for whoever you want.....

    Remember, progress to some is a walmart on every corner...yeehaw.....where everybody will inevitably be employed by 2012 at our current rate of town boards, mayors, and supervisors, bending over......to get f()&*&%........low prices=low quality of life AND less wages

    support china olympics, keep buying shoddily made, toxic foreign crap at walmart or youre not patri

    Posted by jrs112 at 08/08/2008 @ 10:00am

  5. jrs112

    Get a grip on yourself. Your rant contains a few mistakes What you want to complain about is directional drilling. That allows us rednecks to drill under your house from a drill site 2 miles away. Horizontal drill just allows us to have a much larger payzone to suck up the oil. By the way most private land owners do not own the minerial rights under their home, so it is the lease holders oil anyway. Keep an eye on the height of your property. Removing oil does have a nasty affect of causing a sinkhole under your house.

    I do like Walmarts. They let me camp in the parking lots for free.

    Posted by Redneck4Bako at 08/08/2008 @ 10:42am

  6. What color flying horse will MCain ride?

    Aug 4. 2008. Rapture Index stands at 163, down 1 (due to low volcanic activity. Really. I can't make this up.)

    http://www.raptureready.com/rap2.html

    Maybe they have not taken this new "research" into account.

    Posted by crabwalk at 08/08/2008 @ 11:02am

  7. International Standard Version (©2008) A second horse went out. It was fiery red, and its rider was given permission to take peace away from the earth and to make people slaughter one another. So he was given a large sword. New American Standard Bible (©1995) And another, a red horse, went out; and to him who sat on it, it was granted to take peace from the earth, and that men would slay one another; and a great sword was given to him.

    GOD'S WORD® Translation (©1995) A second horse went out. It was fiery red. Its rider was given the power to take peace away from the earth and to make people slaughter one another. So he was given a large sword.

    King James Bible And there went out another horse that was red: and power was given to him that sat thereon to take peace from the earth, and that they should kill one another: and there was given unto him a great sword.

    American King James Version And there went out another horse that was red: and power was given to him that sat thereon to take peace from the earth, and that they should kill one another: and there was given to him a great sword.

    American Standard Version And another horse came forth, a red horse: and to him that sat thereon it was given to take peace from the earth, and that they should slay one another: and there was given unto him a great sword.

    Bible in Basic English And another horse came out, a red horse; and it was given to him who was seated on it to take peace from the earth, so that people might put one another to death: and there was given to him a great sword.

    Douay-Rheims Bible And there went out another horse that was red: and to him that sat thereon, it was given that he should take peace from the earth, and that they should kill one another, and a great sword was given to him.

    Darby Bible Tr

    Posted by crabwalk at 08/08/2008 @ 11:05am

  8. International Standard Version (©2008) A second horse went out. It was fiery red, and its rider was given permission to take peace away from the earth and to make people slaughter one another. So he was given a large sword. New American Standard Bible (©1995) And another, a red horse, went out; and to him who sat on it, it was granted to take peace from the earth, and that men would slay one another; and a great sword was given to him.

    GOD'S WORD® Translation (©1995) A second horse went out. It was fiery red. Its rider was given the power to take peace away from the earth and to make people slaughter one another. So he was given a large sword.

    King James Bible And there went out another horse that was red: and power was given to him that sat thereon to take peace from the earth, and that they should kill one another: and there was given unto him a great sword.

    American King James Version And there went out another horse that was red: and power was given to him that sat thereon to take peace from the earth, and that they should kill one another: and there was given to him a great sword.

    American Standard Version And another horse came forth, a red horse: and to him that sat thereon it was given to take peace from the earth, and that they should slay one another: and there was given unto him a great sword.

    Bible in Basic English And another horse came out, a red horse; and it was given to him who was seated on it to take peace from the earth, so that people might put one another to death: and there was given to him a great sword.

    Douay-Rheims Bible And there went out another horse that was red: and to him that sat thereon, it was given that he should take peace from the earth, and that they should kill one another, and a great sword was given to him.

    Darby Bible Tr

    Posted by crabwalk at 08/08/2008 @ 11:05am

  9. Posted by Redneck4Bako at 08/08/2008 @ 10:42am

    Or do you like them because they support communist authoritarian regimes? Or because your tax dollars probably helped pave the parking lot?

    Posted by crabwalk at 08/08/2008 @ 11:14am

  10. What a stupid article.

    UFOs next?

    This is Rese crap.

    Posted by Benchrest at 08/08/2008 @ 11:22am

  11. These "End Times" folks are like sci-fi/fantasy fanatics (think Star Trek, Lord of the Rings, or Harry Potter), except with dangerous real-world consequences. My greatest fear is that these people, "disappointed" by the End Times' failure to arrive during their lifetimes, will create their own chaos (thus, a self-fulfilling prophecy, without the necessity of supernatural events). Let's all hope and pray that doesn't happen!

    Posted by Be Good at 08/08/2008 @ 11:26am

  12. C'mon, everybody knows Harry P is the 3rd Coming of the Messiah himself.

    Or the 2nd, depending on your investment advisor.

    Everybody knows.

    Posted by sloper at 08/08/2008 @ 11:35am

  13. This thread by Dreyfuss is a canard-

    1. The so-called "respected True Bible Society" is not respected nor known by Biblical Scholars. In fact, a google search does not reveal any website or any references to this supposed organization.

    2. The End Times Journal is an obscure little website that has no links to substantiate who is behind it. It also has not had an updated post since Feb 2007.

    3. David Jenkins is neither a Biblical Scholar nor an Eschatologist (those who study last things). He is a heretic Anglican Bishop who served as Bishop of Durham England.

    Mr. Jenkins denies all of the foundational doctrines of Christinity including the virgin birth, the deity of Jesus as the Son of G-d, and the physical resurrection of Jesus.

    http://www.humanistwa.org.au/files/dennis_morris_7.doc

    Heresy trials are to be brought back by the Church of England. After a gap of 150 years tribunals are to be reintroduced for clergy accused of not believing in God.

    Since then clergy and bishops have been able to deviate from doctrine without punishment. The former Bishop of Durham, the Rt Rev David Jenkins, caused a scandal in the 1980s when he said that he did not believe in the Church's doctrine on the Resurrection.

    http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/393077.stm

    Heresy trials for sceptic priests could split Church

    Many would like to have seen the former bishop of Durham, David Jenkins, taken before some form of disciplinary tribunal over his public doubts about the virgin birth and the resurrection.

    http://tinyurl.com/6bvoo6

    Posted by lvliberty1 at 08/08/2008 @ 11:36am

  14. Spread the fear!

    Posted by abell12ct at 08/08/2008 @ 11:49am

  15. I think an important point here is not how silly these charges may be, but rather that there are people who will take this seriously. To that end, I say lets hope this gets a lot of publicity so Obama can gain some ground.

    Posted by blink710 at 08/08/2008 @ 12:03pm

  16. The Far Left believing in The One and the End Timers pinning Antichrist on McCain!

    What a fun Election! What a country we've got, huh, FZ!!

    Posted by 2HAPPY at 08/08/2008 @ 11:24am

    Happy, How else are people like liverlips and evidently some bonker left wingers as well going to convince people to go to their churches? If you don't scare the crap out of people with eteranl damnation, burning in hell for infinity plus infinity, and much gnashing of the teeth to boot, why would people spend one of their days off from work to not only listen to their B.S., but also donate part of their paycheck so that these lying assholes can pass go and collect the $200 every week in the name of the Lord.

    What I find amusing about all of this is this. If God really wanted to put an end to humans, it would be rather easy for God to do so without McCain, Kerry, W, or whoever else they may want to call the anti-Christ. So, either God doesn't want to end people the way the bible says, God isn't the God we've been told, or perhaps God doesn't exist. Any of the three options are possible.

    Discussing this with brainwashed, brow beaten morons is a waste of time. Those who actually apply reason are a different case though.

    Posted by Wolfgang1 at 08/08/2008 @ 12:24pm

  17. No one wants to play the role of the anti christ since we already know how it turns out for them.It's no fun when you already read the script and know how the movie will end,but,I suppose that we are all supposed to continue to play our roles until the final credits start rolling,but it was a boring movie since we were told all about the story in advance..

    Posted by i'm nobody at 08/08/2008 @ 12:35pm

  18. What a country we've got, huh, FZ!!

    Posted by 2HAPPY at 08/08/2008 @ 11:24am

    well.........

    y'all seem to be nice people.

    you should let canadians pick your government for you.

    hey! that's it!

    you offshore everything else, so why not whatshington?

    (whatshington? i love it!)

    just imagine,

    "AND GOD BLESS AMERICA, EH?"

    Posted by frosty zoom at 08/08/2008 @ 12:55pm

  19. I guess, deep down, we all long for some big special-effects show in the sky, with Super-Giant Jesus/Mohammed/Mazda/Etc/ battling Super-Giant Satan, and "we" win and they lose and "in your face mf" and "I" get beer and sex forever and ever.

    The more we rely on these super-natural forces to take care of extreme Evil and Good, the easier it is for us to abdicate our responsibility to and for ourselves and others.

    ... sometimes feels good to wake up as the anti-christ... definitely a lot easier.

    Besides: "Many people think that the Antichrist will be a evil-seeming leader, but in fact the Bible tells us that he will be charming."

    McCain? Charming? Really?

    Posted by blueCedars at 08/08/2008 @ 12:59pm

  20. you offshore everything else, so why not whatshington?

    (whatshington? i love it!)

    just imagine,

    "AND GOD BLESS AMERICA, EH?"

    Posted by frosty zoom at 08/08/2008 @ 12:55pm

    I've always thought that was a great idea. Those jackasses in congress when the rethugs had control kept saying that the offshoring was actually good for us and the economy. Where are those assholes now?

    I think we should let the Canadians run our medical care system, let the Chinese over see our naational Chamber of Commerce....ooops, they already to, let the British run our foriegn policy...ooops, they already do, and let the rich run everything else...ooops they already do. I guess our government already has been outsourced. We are just the last ones to know.

    Posted by Wolfgang1 at 08/08/2008 @ 12:59pm

  21. mmm... so this explains her evil eyes?

    Posted by carlosbas at 08/08/2008 @ 1:51pm

  22. Happy, you are one confused sheep.

    "The One" is a term created by the republicans. You have borged onto it because you are easily swayed by marketing.

    DO you think doing away with secret ballots is a good thing? Why do you despise democracy so much?

    And, I haven't seen your, or Livers (I love this new title given by POGGE!), list of "approved christian sects".

    I may have some confusing ideas about history, but wasn't your Christ a heretic in his time? For you folk that believe in the Rapture (or whatever title you hide behind) to mock another person for being out of touch...well, irony at it's richest!!

    LIVER, what, in your mind, is the best biblical way to kill heretics? Stoning, fire?

    Posted by crabwalk at 08/08/2008 @ 1:59pm

  23. mmm... so this explains her evil eyes?

    Posted by carlosbas at 08/08/2008 @ 1:51pm

    What, McCain is a cross-dresser? Or perhaps McCain is a woman trapped in a mans body, or better yet, McCain was a man, but had a sex change operation and was changed into a woman, but still politically poses as a man because he could never run on the republican ticket as a woman? How long was he/she a pow in Vietnam again?

    Posted by Wolfgang1 at 08/08/2008 @ 2:03pm

  24. LIVER, what, in your mind, is the best biblical way to kill heretics? Stoning, fire?

    Posted by crabwalk at 08/08/2008 @ 1:59pm

    I wouldn't know. I don't believe in killing heretics and neither is there any commandment or even a suggestion to do so in the NT.

    G-d will take care of that issue when they go before Him.

    Posted by lvliberty1 at 08/08/2008 @ 2:08pm

  25. 2 Chronicles 15:13

    Whosoever would not seek the LORD God of Israel should be put to death, whether small or great, whether man or woman.

    Posted by crabwalk at 08/08/2008 @ 2:26pm

  26. Posted by lvliberty1 at 08/08/2008 @ 11:36am

    See? I KNEW LVLIB could explain to us how Jenkins is the "bad kind" of End Timer....while somebody like John Hagee is the "good kind" of End Timer!

    BTW, Larry...

    "I wouldn't know. I don't believe in killing heretics and neither is there any commandment or even a suggestion to do so in the NT."----Posted by lvliberty1 at 08/08/2008 @ 2:08pm

    You don't take any "suggestions" from the Old Testament?...None?

    Posted by Maskdelta at 08/08/2008 @ 2:27pm

  27. Is this a joke?

    Posted by smmerino at 08/08/2008 @ 2:32pm

  28. I don't believe in killing heretics and neither is there any commandment or even a suggestion to do so in the NT.

    Posted by lvliberty1 at 08/08/2008 @ 2:08pm

    But you DO believe in killing traitors, even though there is no commandment or even a suggestion to do so in the NT.

    Posted by Balrog at 08/08/2008 @ 2:34pm

  29. Or do I have you confused with someone else?

    Posted by Balrog at 08/08/2008 @ 2:35pm

  30. I think it was MaryBretBrad...my apologies, Liberty.

    Posted by Balrog at 08/08/2008 @ 2:36pm

  31. I don't think this was a serious article, especially after seeing the one before about Iraq. That would be why the organization Dreyfuss talks about mysteriously seems not to exist. What the article was designed to do is mock (and fairly effectively, I think) all the people attempting to apply "end times prophecies" to the events of today. Never mind the fact that such attempts, no matter how neatly reasoned from various verses in Revelation and other books, have failed spectacularly every time they've been tried. Never mind the quote from Jesus himself actively DISCOURAGING end-times speculation. Somehow, it continues...

    Also...heresy trials, seriously? Is this actually happening?

    Posted by Thrawn at 08/08/2008 @ 2:46pm

  32. Good thing we aren't all kooks eh? Other wise this might actually affect our vote.

    "Posted by 2HAPPY at 08/08/2008 @ 11:24am"

    Happy I think most of the Christian kooks who believe in this junk are on your side.

    Posted by Cccomfo1 at 08/08/2008 @ 2:53pm

  33. I think it was MaryBretBrad...my apologies, Liberty.

    Posted by Balrog at 08/08/2008 @ 2:36pm

    No apology needed Balrog. Liver believes that it is completely God will for our military to storm into other countries and kill their innocents in the name of God, country, goodness, wholesomeness, good moral standing, and well, what the John Wayne movies tell us to do. What is the line the bad pirate says in "Pirates"? They aren't laws, the more like guidelines. That's how guys like Liv can get away with using the old testament for killing at will, and use the new testament to act like they are all forgiving and cheritable. It's a pretty damned handy book for pretty much doing anything you like, and finding a passage to back you up, just don't use the Lord's name in vain though. That's the worst sin of all.

    Posted by Wolfgang1 at 08/08/2008 @ 2:54pm

  34. McCain IS the Antichrist!

    This is great!

    We should spread the Endtimes Journal to every Christian website and circulate it on all of those chain email bots that falsely claim Obama is a Muslim.

    I think most Evangelicals will be much more afraid of the Antichrist (McCain) that wants us in Iraq for 100 years than a Christian with a Muslim name (Obama) who has absolutely no interest in "controlling" the ancient land of Babylon!

    Here is a draft of the email script:

    Did you Know John McCain is the Antichrist?

    Biblical scholars have concluded that the Antichrist is supposed to control the ancient land of Babylon, now located in Iraq, for at least 100 years. He is also supposed to have a name "likening him to God".

    John McCain has promised that he wants to occupy Iraq for 100 years, and sees this occupation as important and worth dying for.

    It also turns out that the name "McCain" was actually "Mihai", which means "who is like the Lord." John McCain's great-grandfather was named John Mihai, but the last name was later changed to McCain to disguise the evil mission of the Antichrist.

    Responsible Christians of America must stop John McCain from rising to power to control the ancient land of Babylon.

    Please vote AGAINST John McCain to show your love for Jesus!

    Posted by Metteyya at 08/08/2008 @ 3:05pm

  35. Please vote AGAINST John McCain to show your love for Jesus!

    Posted by Metteyya at 08/08/2008 @ 3:05pm

    Metteyya, Sorry to say, but you are wrong on this one. Remember that the holier than thou folks like Liv figure they will be spared in the end and go straigth to heaven without passing go even. They would vote for the anti-Christ to fullfill God's will because they know they are just and God will save them.

    Damn, I am starting to sound like Liver.

    Posted by Wolfgang1 at 08/08/2008 @ 3:28pm

  36. Posted by 2HAPPY at 08/08/2008 @ 3:11pm

    Remember, every time HAPP says "Magic"...he's thinking "Magic NEGRO"!

    And various...uh....derivations! Just like his boss Rush.

    Posted by Maskdelta at 08/08/2008 @ 3:30pm

  37. Why is it that all thest preachers, David Jenkins, Jeremiah Wrigt... all say that America is going to Hell and damnation?

    Posted by Mistral at 08/08/2008 @ 09:20am

    Maybe they know something we don't?

    Posted by skeletonman at 08/08/2008 @ 4:04pm

  38. Posted by 2HAPPY at 08/08/2008 @ 3:21pm

    No no. The first part was in my own words. Then I posted the sig from your post. Then my response to your post. No where was I quoting you.

    Posted by Cccomfo1 at 08/08/2008 @ 4:07pm

  39. Posted by 2HAPPY at 08/08/2008 @ 3:53pm

    Not a shocker. Politicians do this crap all the time. Hell McCain left his wife for a younger richer version.

    Posted by Cccomfo1 at 08/08/2008 @ 4:08pm

  40. Posted by 2HAPPY at 08/08/2008 @ 3:53pm

    Clinton did it in the White House for God's sake.

    Posted by Cccomfo1 at 08/08/2008 @ 4:10pm

  41. Posted by 2HAPPY at 08/08/2008 @ 3:37pm

    HAPP, you think you can lie to yourself as easy as you try to lie to us.

    Convince yourself that when Rush plays "Barack the Magic NEGRO" and you use "magic" over and over...it's just a "drug reference"???

    Okay.

    Posted by Maskdelta at 08/08/2008 @ 4:10pm

  42. As a religious psychohistorian, I can confirm this thesis of John McCaananite as anti-Christ independently by analysis of the anthrax poisoning event we are seeing unfold. It goes with: the Joker (poison powder, moved from the US mailroom, through liberal Senator's Daschle and Leahy's offices, onto the singular 'flask' (we're talking alchemy here; stay hip) under 'Ivins' (that's "living" minus the -l) control) ... Ivins is 2Face, mirroring the 2Face FIB that created him (Batman is Obama, hanging around somewhere sans Robin) .... The poison literally injected into America ('n) s bloodstream in '01 has come back around 7 years later as poison injected into the bloodstream of its communications through the hollow tube of the case presented by the Federal Bureau of Investigation that Bruce Ivins mailed the anthrax. Everytime the matter comes, or is brought to mind, from now on, this double-loop of poisoning America, poisoning American communication must replay. The entire case against the FBI's case against Ivins is laid out here: http://sidthomas.blogspot.com/

    Now, go with the mythic (group-fantasy) texture for a minute. What brings poison? (say: serpents) What poisoned the pure Aryan-Nordic-Prussian bloodstream in Nazi Germany? (say: the Jews) How does Protocol of the Learned Elders of Zion #3 say the Jews will manifest when the time is right? -- as a great encircling SNAKE! (look it up). (We all know the PLEOZ is debunked, but HEY! so is Jesus; still useful heheh)

    There you about have it, once you reverse "Allah is Great" in the last line of the anthrax letters, following "Death" aimed at America and Israel, to YHWH Rules. Add in: Israelis are pro McCaananite -- something about the very smell of Obama's genes, I heard.

    You don't even need th

    Posted by jones at 08/08/2008 @ 4:15pm

  43. The last necessary comment, rudely snipped, was:

    You don't even need the Bible to know McCain is anti-Christ. But there WAS that mind numbing affinity between Eve and the Old One back before the original sinning started up.. It's a sad commentary on American intellectuals when Bible Scholars in Colorado Springs know the theological skinny and they don't.

    (As Old Adam, he could use some help in the Eve dept., in my opinion, and I can't see her and Mrs. Sarkozy having that much to talk about. Just me.)

    Posted by jones at 08/08/2008 @ 4:23pm

  44. I think a big part of the problem is the word itself...

    Posted by Thrawn at 08/08/2008 @ 4:49pm

  45. It sure is nice to see the left useing religion when it suits them. If it doesn't help their cause they would rather bury it in a corner and make everyone forget it exists. But even if they do want to go into the religion area just remember the anti-christ is also the great deciever, he will tell you whatever you want to hear to get into office and do whatever he wants when he get there. So does Obama really want to leave Iraq or is it just telling that to get your vote.

    Posted by middleborn at 08/08/2008 @ 5:37pm

  46. Antichrists are party animals. Watch for a guy whose face glows under the lampshade as he drunkenly cavorts among the guests. A dead giveaway is the old "light a match to your breath" trick, done without consuming an entire bottle of hard stuff. Look for bragging about the great tail docker he's found. Then wait for news report of vet hospitalized in state of apoplexy after "weird guy" shows for treatment. The presence of paparazzi crowded outside a special "fireproof" home is another warning sign. Remember an Anti has to start somewhere & don't let unattended BBQs in your neighborhood make you feel sorry these guys.

    Posted by Sorelish at 08/08/2008 @ 6:40pm

  47. Do all you people have your heads so far up your collective arses that you can't see satire in front of your faces? Especially hilarious is lvliberty's 3-part takedown of the 'factual' errors in this piece. It's satire, doofus. the proper response is to chuckle to yourself and say "man, I sure am glad I don't live in colorado springs." And then move on. That is it. lvliberty you are a fool.

    Posted by maddening_crowd at 08/08/2008 @ 7:03pm

  48. You're slipping badly! Not even worth responding to many of your bottom-of-the-deck cards!

    Posted by 2HAPPY at 08/08/2008 @ 4:43pm

    You're really going for it here aren't ya little guy? someone nails you so just accuse them of slipping badly. Keep digging, you might get to the Olympics

    Posted by ADHD at 08/08/2008 @ 7:07pm

  49. What the hell are we talking about? Antichrist? What century are we in? Do we even have to listen to the morons? Nice to know where they are though. At least we are warned. Religious left or right ARE the real ennemy

    Posted by pachonegro at 08/08/2008 @ 8:50pm

  50. Mad_crow

    You are close. Total contempt for the slack brain commentary one gets on these boards is right on, of course, but you seem to suppose satire isn't serious business. In fact, true satire is double snake-head brain content (like one of those little hologram things you can hold one way to see one picture, then turn another way to see another) usefull for Satanic pathological liars and psychochotic killers (repubs) to wrap themselves in, like 2Face. Their very being is snake brain satanic satirical, which is why John McCain is their candidate for President of the United States. Souless stub-arm little bastard that he is, just what they deserve. They are satires of what humanity is.

    And with the anthrax poisoning of Americans and American communications (one for the blood, the other for the mind), plus the shoot-'em-until-they kill-you mentality of Right Wing terrorist haters of liberals, like that guy Jim Adkisson did at the Tennessee Valley Universalist Unitarian Church, and the Canadian beheader (I'm guessing he isn't progressive, but he didn't speak a word, they said. That's more right wing; they know they sound stupid when they talk, which is why 12 ft Geico lizards are use to help them get their message across.)

    Yessir, if anti-Christ wasn't already a card in play, they'd have to make him up. hahahahahahahah

    Posted by jones at 08/08/2008 @ 9:36pm

  51. To be anti-Christ, is to be anti/against what Christ taught.

    The term "antichrist" only appears five times in the Bible, but a cult not based on sound theology has created an urban legend that seeks Armageddon. The term "antichrist" never appears in John's Revelation or Daniel, two disparate works of literature written three centuries apart and under very different circumstances, yet the Left Behinder's weave them together.

    The small texts that mention the "antichrist" were written to attack the Gnostic understanding of who Christ was. A Gnostic relies on intuition and not on dogma and doctrine. Gnostic's were most certainly free spirits and most all of the writings we have about Gnostics, have been the attacks upon them. That all changed when the Nag Hamadi Library was translated and published, for what had been deemed heretical by those in power in the fourth century can now be read in most every language.

    The theology promoted in the "Left Behind" fiction is a theology based on fear and punishment.

    The followers of this heretical theology worship a false god: a punitive father, who seeks obedience, is patriarchal, demonizes woman, gays, lesbians, and seek empire on this world and care naught for the fragility of Mother Nature. They resist what science offers, in particular they are antichristic in their refusal to see that stem cell research could lead to actual HEALINGS of diseases, and JC was very big into healing.

    I cite John 5: 1-6, which in some readings is prefaced with an angel from heaven, would descend and agitate the waters of the Pool of Bethsaida. Only the first leper, blind, or invalid who made it into the water would receive a healing. One day...

    Do You Want to be Healed? July 16, 2008: WAWA WeAreWideAwake eileen fleming

    Posted by eileenfleming at 08/08/2008 @ 10:53pm

  52. this is a very funny article.

    bravo, sir dreyfuss, bravo!

    and now, posters,

    babble on!

    Posted by frosty zoom at 08/09/2008 @ 01:03am

  53. Thanks, Frosty! Ahem, to many of you intrepid readers of my blog: I made all of this post up. It was satire. That means, it's supposed to be funny. Though I do hope the Christian right picks it up as straight news. They just might. Some of you did!

    Posted by RobertDreyfuss at 08/09/2008 @ 06:50am

  54. HEY DOOFUSS ---

    The Dreyfuss affair:

    He Jew trolled your lulz.

    Not mine, though. This satire is true satanic snake brain.

    "Yessir, if anti-Christ wasn't already a card in play, they'd have to make him up. hahahahahahahah "

    (Joker laugh of 2Face Jew anthrax poisoner LOL ;=>)

    Posted by jones at 08/09/2008 @ 09:03am

  55. The real satire is...

    John McCain running for president as a MaveriK.

    Posted by crabwalk at 08/09/2008 @ 10:19am

  56. Thanks, Frosty! Ahem, to many of you intrepid readers of my blog: I made all of this post up. It was satire. That means, it's supposed to be funny. Though I do hope the Christian right picks it up as straight news. They just might. Some of you did!

    Posted by RobertDreyfuss at 08/09/2008 @ 06:50am

    As one of the Christian right Pastors you mocked, you might take notice that the first sentence of my posting was that your thread article is a canard-that means a hoax for the unenlightened.

    I then provided evidence to back up my assertion.

    Posted by lvliberty1 at 08/09/2008 @ 11:24am

  57. Thanks, Frosty...I made all of this post up. ...

    Posted by RobertDreyfuss at 08/09/2008 @ 06:50am

    You got us all worked up, you nefarious so and so.

    Posted by skeletonman at 08/09/2008 @ 4:21pm

  58. Ha Ha Mr Dreyfuss!

    Of course the wrinkly one is the Beast! What else could he be? He even looks a bit like a T Rex.

    Posted by mikecope at 08/10/2008 @ 11:50am

  59. a very good one haven't laughed so much since I saw the paris hilton add

    Posted by bascaville at 08/10/2008 @ 12:42pm

  60. This is a clever spoof, plain and simple, as lvliberty1 and others have noted.

    Problem may be, there are so many ill-educated Christians and anti-Christians that many will accept this journalistic joke as real and will rant about it for days.

    Of course, this fictitious blog in some ways makes as much sense as critical commentators on both sides of the freedom/control ("progressive") divide.

    Posted by veritable at 08/10/2008 @ 12:43pm

  61. If you think we Harry Potter/ Star Trek/ LOTRings geeks are nuts try telling a fan of the "Left Behind" series it's fiction, not prophecy. Let the wailing begin.

    Posted by Pogge at 08/10/2008 @ 3:46pm

  62. McCain's geniality and folksiness are consistent with his being the Antichrist, Jenkins said. "Many people think that the Antichrist will be a evil-seeming leader, but in fact the Bible tells us that he will be charming."

    Whew! It's not him. Since when did he become charming? Not so says the media. Maybe it's Obama...

    Posted by woodyee at 08/10/2008 @ 4:10pm

  63. Cheney's the anti-Christ. The charm thing was just a red herring the devil tossed in to throw us off the scent.

    Posted by Pogge at 08/10/2008 @ 5:11pm

  64. now you get the allusion.

    Posted by frosty zoom at 08/11/2008 @ 12:00am

  65. Geez, the witching hour already-at least in EST.

    Posted by Pogge at 08/11/2008 @ 12:14am

  66. damn,

    the twitching hour is upon us!

    Posted by frosty zoom at 08/11/2008 @ 02:55am

  67. "Souless stub-arm little bastard that he is,..."Posted by jones at 08/08/2008 @ 9:36pm

    Man, this is THE funniest description of Mccain that I've read so far. Good one!

    Posted by k330k at 08/11/2008 @ 2:43pm

  68. Good job, Mr. Dreyfuss. Mision accomplished. I thought it was funny too but only because I thought it was truthful. Satire or no, it's still hilarious.

    Posted by k330k at 08/11/2008 @ 2:44pm

  69. egad!

    obama is the antichrist:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mopkn0lPzM8&fmt=18

    Posted by frosty zoom at 08/11/2008 @ 8:39pm

  70. Aw shucks. All this time, I thought Dick, the Prince of Darkness, Cheney, was the Antichrist.

    Posted by Maggie65 at 08/12/2008 @ 11:51am

  71. In my humble opinion, Reagan was the Antichrist.

    R-o-n-a-l-d W-i-l-s-o-n R-e-a-g-a-n. Count the letters: six, six, six. The number of the Beast!

    Posted by JakobFabian at 08/12/2008 @ 12:41pm

  72. to baked redneck who likes to camp in walmart parking lots, you never identify which law allows states and the feds to disregard NEPA and SEQRA for horizontal drilling and "frac"ing....you basically say "that" allows...without referring to the GOP administration which allows this...."this" is the whole point; it should be regulated; you are not very well-informed, you just want to say you can do whatever you want, and the point remains that, if everybody else acts like you, that is anarchy....people with tiny penises who drive SUVs, I have found, are not so macho when they are not road-raging and tailgating....if your end desire in life is to camp in walmart, fine, but realize only state law which highly subsidizes walmart and big-boxes allows these crapstores to be built, rezoning, eminent domain, etc...is not magic, does not produce revenue, hurts taxpayers, just like uncontrolled drilling.....everybody will have to answer, it is not a free-for-all, we all drink water, and ignorant bush feels all geology is the same, it doesn't help that halliburton is the one whose research allowed for this horizontal drilling; the other issue is not the horizontal drilling, but the 290 chemicals which are harmful to human health involved in "frac" ing which the EPA under a new administration will force companies to reveal, which is why there is a sudden rush to drill before the next administration which will hopefully care more about human health.....

    I am sure you live in a little redneck burb with the largest employer being walmart...and have zero quality of life...your selfish greed and ignorance doesn't represent the other 99% of Americans who actually care about the land, environment, and welfare of Americans....I am sure you, like bush, don't believe in science, either....

    Posted by jrs112 at 08/12/2008 @ 1:34pm

  73. From baked redneck living in walmart parking lot: "Horizontal drill just allows us to have a much larger payzone to suck up the oil. By the way most private land owners do not own the minerial rights under their home, so it is the lease holders oil anyway. Keep an eye on the height of your property. Removing oil does have a nasty affect of causing a sinkhole under your house"

    BTW: it was natural gas, you dolt, not oil...that is utilizing this new procedure to explore for shale gas...research shit before you comment on it.....now get back in your camper on your walmart parking lot.....yee haw...

    Posted by jrs112 at 08/12/2008 @ 1:39pm

  74. to baked redneck:

    walmart is not "letting you camp in their parking lots for free" they just overbuilt parking lots for no good reason; we have too many parking lots in this country and 90% of our transportation dollars has went to highways and very little to public transit....

    Smelly rednecks like you camping in walmart parking lots are the reason nobody wants to ride public transit.....do you even know how to trap or hunt, or is anything remotely useful not even a requirement to call oneself a redneck anymore????

    Most "rednecks" are actually pretty damn self-sufficient....

    Walmart is anti-American and sucks money from our country...it is not "patriotic" and most rednecks are patriotic, sometimes to a virulent degree......

    That being said, from your own description, you are more trailer trash than anything else.....and are unable to see the "big picture" of what is going on.....you are the reason the electoral college was invented, because the ordinary voter is mostly ignorant, like you....and cannot be trusted to vote...now this same technique is employed by neocons to disenfranchise poor people......

    Posted by jrs112 at 08/12/2008 @ 1:50pm

  75. Endtimers love the Cheney, Bush / LV, Jommm, Happ side. I know several. They were white hot over Cheney Bush in 2004, totally behind invading Iraq, etc etc.

    Posted by winyahn at 08/13/2008 @ 12:07am

  76. If Jenkins' discovery and theory are true about Senator McCain's genealogy that is indeed cause for alarm because it means there is most likely a link between THE ONE and the Count of Transylvania!!! If my conjecture is correct we are really in dire straits. Is it possible that the THE ONE'S roots go back to Count Dracula? Or is it the other way round? Its so confusing. But indeed confusion is a sign that THE ONE is on his way is it not: his arrival is proximate! You can almost feel it, like the way the intrepid warriors of the Stargate film feel when they are about to pass through the stargate's membrane. The anticipation is almost too much. Mercy, I hope we is all one of the 4400. I hope leading scholar Jenkins will look into this. Mr. Dreyfuss, how can I get in touch with him on this urgent matter?

    Posted by Jeffrs at 08/13/2008 @ 12:17pm

  77. A PS to my first comment. Mr Dreyfuss, given the urgency of the matter - after all we are talking about the end of the world as we know it any time now - would it be possible to move my first comment up to the top of the comments entries. That way everbody will be sure to see it. Many thanks in advance. Oh yes I almost forgot, why hasn't the Gray Lady plastered this story all over its front page?

    Posted by Jeffrs at 08/13/2008 @ 12:22pm

  78. Just when I think things cannot get more stupid...

    Posted by pyeatte at 08/13/2008 @ 2:17pm

  79. Pyeatte, things can always get more stupid.

    Posted by RobertDreyfuss at 08/13/2008 @ 5:10pm

  80. Pyeatte, things can always get more stupid.

    Posted by RobertDreyfuss at 08/13/2008

    no, please!

    not again...........

    Posted by frosty zoom at 08/13/2008 @ 9:54pm

Advertisement
Advertisement

Blogs

» The Beat

Feingold's Outline for a Constitutional Presidency | In a letter to Obama, Constitution subcommittee chair seeks a commitment to end executive excess.
John Nichols
Posted at 2:15 PM ET

» State of Change

Mukasey, Elliott Abrams Get Last-Minute Bush Appointments | Abusing the transition process to take care of aides, friends and supporters
John Nichols
Posted at 2:14 PM ET

» Capitolism

Yes to Special Elections for Senators | Remember the 17th amendment?
Christopher Hayes

» The Dreyfuss Report

Panetta? Ummmmm... Well..... | Could Obama have made a weirder choice for CIA director? Here's why Panetta is doomed.
Robert Dreyfuss

» Act Now!

Allow Media into Gaza | Israel is encouraging abuses by preventing foreign journalists from entering the Gaza Strip.
Peter Rothberg

» Editor's Cut

A Trillion Dollar Recovery | We don't need a stimulus, we need a recovery. And that means investing $1 trillion over the next two years.
Katrina vanden Heuvel

» The Notion

Hard Times Without Studs | One of Terkel’s former book editors considers a Studs-less world.
Tom Engelhardt

» And Another Thing

Bill Ayers Whitewashes History, Again | The Weathermen were not just a bunch of idealistic young people.
Katha Pollitt